Banana Bread and Banana Phones

What did you do with your Leap Day?

Here's what C, J, P, M, MP and I did:

C: I just feel like everyone was like, on one tonight. I don't even know what was going on.

H: She's just super pretty and gets asked on dates all the time. Like, she probably goes on 3 dates a week.

P: Wait....are you talking about yourself?

C: Are you kidding me?? Did anyone else see that?

P: See what? I was just saying.

C: You are hitting on her right in front of everyone!

H: I feel so pregnant right now!

C: Okay you guys always try to set us up with people when we are around them. Stop.

H: "I feel like - you know how sometimes, you get in the pool, and it's cold -" *Boys burst out laughing* ".....Okay please calm down, that's not what I'm talking about. I'm just saying, when the pool is cold, and you swim for a while, you get used to it, and I feel like tonight, I've been swimming in a pool of awkwardness. So now I don't even feel like anything is awkward anymore."

C: Let's just all lay all our cards on the table. I'm C. I don't like you. Or you. You both are attractive, but we're not gonna date. And......that's it.

H: Look, M. This is the dress I'm going to wear. My roommate wore it when she did a pageant.

P: Yeah, her roommate is really cute.

H: OKAY, M, why don't you just keep hitting on my roommate?

C: [discreetly talking about a boy to H and the whole table stops to listen]

C: Okay, we'll talk about this later.

P: Wait, tell us!

H: I talk to them about boys all the time.

P: There are no secrets here.

C: Okay.... [tells the whole entire story with even more detail]

P: What's that, C? Oh I think I dropped something.... (bending over seductively (ish) )

M: *singing*

H: You know this song?

M: No.....they're just all the same

H: But that's how this one goes!

M: Yeah. Cuz they're all the same.

P: Buck futter!

H: What is that, like tig 'ol bitties?

C: Oh my gosh, H, stop saying that

J: So it's P and H, and me and C.

P: Whoa, just cuz you like her the best doesn't mean that she likes you.

J: Cut the banana bread on the cutting board. (repeats this 4x)

H: *cutting the banana bread on the cooling rack*

J: H! I just said, cut. the banana bread. on the cutting board. I said that like 4 times! Now it's gonna be all crumbly!

C: *doing the sign for "never"*

P: C, why didn't you just tell us that you never kissed anyone?

C: What? I never.....I just said....

P: No it's fine. Like you don't have to be embarrassed, that's really cool.

J: P, just because you want to date H.....

P: What!?

H: Wow, C, J must really like you because he just threw me under the bus when P was giving you a hard time.

P: Oh wow, so dating me is like getting thrown under the bus?! Thank you.

C: Everyone is just throwing everyone under the bus now

J: Are you guys txting? While sitting next to each other?

H: Noooo.....

C: Maybe if you would stop reading our signs......

H: Okay, no. Let me just tell you what P once said.

M: Mmmm, I love first date stories.

C: My first date was with Joe. [Talks about the date]....and my mom, grandma, and great-grandma all met him -

H: Wait. Your mom, grandma, and great-grandma all went on the date?

C: No! they were there when he came to get me!

J: I just remember going up to C's door, with brownies, to apologize. And it seems like it happened more than once.

C: It did. And my mom made me go talk to you. Because I wasn't going to.

J: MP comes over and immediately gets set up on a date. I've been asking for weeks and I still have not been set up!

P: Well at least dating you isn't equivalent to being thrown under a bus.

H: I'm sorry, wasn't it you who said you'd rather jump off a cliff than -

P: I'm sorry, I was twelve and awkward when I said that!

P: Sorry M, MP is taken.

C: .......

P: What? Everyone else has been linked together at this table.

C: (to MP) I mean, I never like, liked you.

P: ....YEAH you did!

C: (bright red) Okay I mean....we all kind of liked all of you at some point.

H: So what are you going to do with that last banana bread?

J: We were going to give that one to our home-teachees.

P: Yeah but do you think that would be weird? Like because they're dudes? And we made banana bread?

J: Ooooh, you're right.

P: Like, hey boys, we just made this banana bread for you :)!

J: Plus it's too far a walk.

P: Well. We tried.

H: So uhh....now what are you going to do with that last banana bread?

J: Go ahead and have some.

P: Okay M's coming over. He's awesome, one of you can date him.

C: Again with the setting us up.....

MP: Are you two like, dating, can you just get married already?

H: (authoritatively) I just have something to say!!!

*M and P each grab a banana and shove it in H's face like a microphone*

C: I got a letter from A!

MP: Are you waiting for him?

C: .....

MP: It's okay if you are. I'm waiting for him too.

C: Okay, obviously I'm not waiting for everyone, sorry you think so....

MP: Listen. Focus. I have a story.

C: Okay I have been paired up with everyone at this table tonight. And some people who are not here. Anyone else?

MP: And then I was like, what the heck am I supposed to do with this?

H: (talking into a banana....obviously the night had taken a turn for the worse.....)

M: (picking up another banana and also talking into it) Oh hey.

H: How did you get my number? I thought you were in love with my roommate.

M: Oh right. Hi, is J there?

H: *hanging up*

M: ....Hello?

If anyone has anything to add.....I know I am missing a ton so please contribute via txt or blog comment :)