Why would I try it?

I heard THE WORST thing on the radio the other day. The DJ was talking about prenuptial agreements and said that now, not only are people writing prenups for money and stuff, but they are also writing lifestyle prenups. That means that they write out their expectations for their marriage, and if those expectations aren't met, it's grounds for a divorce.

Here are some of the examples they gave:

- If either spouse gains 40 lbs --> divorce.
- If either spouse cheats, the other one can cheat on them right back.
- The wife wanted to go dancing at least 4 times a year, and if her husband didn't take her, she was allowed to go with whoever she chose.
- If the husband was going to have an affair, the wife had a list of all the women she would be okay with him having an affair with.




I thought this whole discussion was ridiculous and sad and I hated it. So when my parents came out for my graduation, and it was still on my mind, this conversation happened:

me: Mom, what would you do if Dad gained 40 lbs?
Mom: He wouldn't.
me: But what if he did!
Mom: I guess I'd tell him to work out....
me: Oh. What if you gained 40 lbs, what would Dad do?
Mom: I have no idea, why would I try it?!

Which is a response I really like. I guess when I get married, I won't try it, either.

Goooooaaaaallllll!

We talked about goals at school today. I had my kids write down their top 3 goals and put them into a kind of soccer-themed craftivity.

Here was my favorite:

Kids these days.

And for anyone who has been wondering, the Sexy Uncle did not drop off the face of the Earth. I met him on Saturday, as a matter of fact. 

I appreciate

Teacher Appreciation Week. Because it looks like this:

This on Monday.

This on Tuesday at lunchtime (I forgot to take a picture until I'd already started eating it, lo siento...

This on Thursday (almost made me cry, you guys)

This plus rolls plus cinammon butter plus chicken plus pork from Texas Roadhouse on Friday.

Also this on Friday.

I appreciation Teacher Appreciation Week so much, in fact, that when I get home, I do things that you might not expect from me.

For instance, I handed flowers to this guy who came along to help me clean out my trunk, and he  waited until his roommates could see, then handed them back to me, saying "Here you go, Heather" as if he had gotten them for me...

Another instance, I did this:

THAT'S RIGHT I WENT RUNNING.

Outside, you guys. For 2 miles. I was motivated by the following:

- the new shorts
- the guy
- the ever-imminent fear that at any moment, I could be attacked and I would have to run even faster to escape
- the Sidney Bristow
- the new jorts (again)

And, in a truth that is perhaps even more shocking than the fact that I went running outside at all, I actually kind of....really liked it.

Easter cupcakes

Last year, if you had asked me what food I associated with Easter, I probably would have said eggs. This year, my answer would not be eggs. Yes, I dyed about five Easter eggs. And yes, I have an egg salad sammich in my lunch today. And yes, I do love deviled eggs. But for whatever reason, eggs did not take over my Easter this year.

These did:

These are the leftovers. After 3 different roommates took 3 different kinds of cupcakes to 3 different Easter dinners and we gave some away to cousins of studly boys and thought about giving some away to the girls we visit teach.

Not that I'm complaining....