If Only

This morning, being the slightly narcissistic person that I am, I made my second-graders write in their journals about me. Specifically, what they would give me for my birthday if they could give me anything in the world.

Don't judge me. I like birthdays. Especially my own.

Here are some of my favorite responses:

 

Translation: "OK Miss Connor, what do you want for your birthday ooo I know what you want for your birthday a toaster ya that's what you want ooo wait. I know what you want a mug ya that's what you want wait. I know what you want you want two mugs ya that's what you want!"

 

 Translation: "If I could give Miss Connor anything. It would be a brand-new car. And a flat screen tv. And that's what I would get Miss Connor."

 

Translation: "If I had to give Miss Connor something in the whole wide world I would give her a new car and a new house! I would give you one hundred and three fish."

Translation: "Since tomorrow is Miss Connor's bday I would give her a birthday card and a craft, a good craft, and after her bday maybe a 100 dollar bill. Oh she would like that a lot. No make that 100 dollar bill into a 100 million dollar bill. That would be better."

 

Translation: "If I could give Miss Connor a present I would give her a note and a watch and pencils and pens."

 

Translation: "The present I would give her is a dog and a boyfriend and a cat and fish."

Translation: "It would be a fish and it would be a beta it would be with a fish bowl."

And my personal favorite.....

 

Translation: "If I could give Miss Connor anything in the world it would be a cute boyfriend and he would have a cute car. And she would always bring him in and at lunch and kiss and kiss and kiss all day long the end."