Vegas Virgin No Longer

Last week, I was a Vegas Virgin. Now, I can no longer say that.

Sunday morning was a bit of a stress-fest with keys getting lost and plans being delayed a few hours, but we eventually got ourselves on the road and set off! 

Our fearless driver!

Do you wanna kick it in the backseat?

I made mix CD's for the trip. Not gonna lie, it kind of gave me anxiety as I was making them and every single song was chosen with the utmost care. I tried to imagine all of my friends laughing and singing along enthusiastically as if we were in some 50's convertible car commercial, and if I couldn't picture it, the song didn't make the cut. The result is some pretty rock-awesome mixes, you guys. 

We made it to Vegas just in time for dinner at Steve's sister's house. She has literally 2 of the cutest kids I have ever seen, ever, so we hung out there for a little bit, and then got ready to hit the strip, just to look around at night. 

Tony Stark stood in front of this very statue. The beginning of our fame?

Vegas is an interesting place on a Sunday night. The crowds are thinner and more hungover than on a Friday or Saturday, but the signs are just as vibrant and demanding. Everywhere, something is flashing in your face. There's always a bigger, brighter, or flashier sign. There's always a bigger jackpot. (There's always a bigger crackpot.) Smoke trails around you, unintentionally symbolizing the way money and dreams and clothes disappear so quickly around here. 

Despite all the smoke and glazed expressions, I did enjoy the following about Vegas at night:

*the lights

*the awesome spray-painter guy

*the statues

*the Bellagio fountains

Vegas is also an interesting place on a Monday morning! Winnie, Christine and I took our sweet time getting ready, which was too bad for Steve, whose nephew woke him up at 7 with a freezer pack to the face. 

We had Earl of Sandwich for breakfast / lunch, and that was one of the best decisions ever made in Vegas! 

Then we went to the penny slots. You have to put in $1 but then you can play a ton! At least I think you can....I didn't really understand the game, but I got $1.57. I took that little voucher and went to the next penny slot machine.  

And thatttt machine paid for my Earl of Sandwich! And gave me an extra $9 besides! Which I did not even mind. Thank you, Las Vegas. I knew I liked you. 

Vegas has a lot more to offer, too. We got an exclusive demonstration of how different sodas are made upstairs in the Coca Cola store, and also tasted sodas from all around the world. Some were delicus. Some were egregious. I guess you could say the same about a lot of things. 

We also found a free 10-minute 3D movie at the M&M store!

Palm trees are basically my favorite plant in the world, and there was an abundance of them in Vegas. Did you know that each palm tree costs $300? Sometimes I like to count them and figure out how much a specific street corner cost somebody. Maybe it was paid for by the people who played the penny slots and lost?

We bid farewell to the sparkling city and continued on our way to the Golden State: California!

Peggy-Sue was the first person to welcome us. We saw about a million signs advertising this cute little 50's diner and HAD to go! 

The second person to welcome us to Cali was a Finnish movie star. Actually, there were three of them! And they picked the booth right behind us to shoot their oh-so-famous gonna-be-a-big-fat-hit documentary of Peggy-Sue's Diner. Steve talked to them as if they were normal people. I stared at them as if they were movie stars. And I might have spent my meal leaning really far back, trying to get in as many shots as possible. 

We rolled into Steve's neighborhood in La Canada (pronounced The Canada, if you're a real local of the area) late at night, under a thick cover of some weird fog conjured up by Winnie's wish for a world full of clouds. 

You may not understand the following list of quotes, but try to enjoy them anyway:

"I feel like I'm in Seattle right now, where it rains 367 days out of the year. 

.....because there are 367 days in the year. Because it rains so much, that they get an extra 2 days in the year. 4 days? 3?"

"I just want some cream to rub on my....areas."

"You have to shower. What if someone sees you on TV, in hi-def, and they're like, daaaaang!"

S: You would pick that magazine. 

H: I picked it because it's political! And I'm intelligent.

S: You picked it because of the boobs. You have been all about boobs this weekend!

W: I guess you just always notice what you don't have?

"We need to just, stop having each other's backs."

"I'm gonna staple your face."

Obviously, it was a wonderful time :)

Menstruating Monsters Approaching

Last night, I was at work at Coldstone. I stood behind the register, cheerfully ringing people up. Customers scooted through the line, cheerfully ordering their ice cream.

"This looks so good!" one girl said to me as I rang her up.

"I love that kind!" I agreed.

"I'm going to be having cramps for a week because of it, but whatever," she added, holding out her credit card.

My hand froze mid-credit card grab. "Are you lactose-intolerant?" I asked, a little alarmed.

"No, just when I'm menstruating, I get really....." she trailed off. "Why am I telling you this?"

I laughed and took her card. "That's okay," I said, "I get it."

"You know what I mean?" she continued. "Just with your cycle, you sometimes really shouldn't eat ice cream that is drowning in caramel and other yummy stuff, but sometimes you just really want it."

The receipt printed. "I know what you mean!" I assured her, handing her the receipt. "Can you just sign there?"

She took the pen. "I still don't know why I told you all that...." she said, signing the receipt.

But in real life, I didn't even mind that much. She was actually one of my favorite customers of the night.....maybe even of ever.

Lost and.....not found :(

So when you are an elementary school teacher, you need to have a plan book. This plan book is where you put all of your lessons, the seating chart for your classroom, the schedule for the day, everything. I had one last semester and used it perfectly, just like I was supposed to. Then I put it somewhere where it would be really easy to find it this semester, since I was going to need it again.

Does anyone know where that place might be?

I looked around today for it. My search started out pretty casual as I skipped through my room, glancing here and there. After a few minutes it became a little bit more methodical. When I still couldn't find it, I became annoyed, and then frantic. I went through every box, bag, and tupperware container in my closet. I moved everything out from under my bed. I checked in all of my dresser drawers.

I found:

*five rotten, dry, hard, deformed clementines. They had to be at least 8 months old.

*a long-sleeved shirt I'd been missing

*a sweater dress I'd been missing

*2 pairs of never-been-worn boots still in their boxes with the tissue paper around them

*1 pair of black Sunday shoes, similarly in a box with tissue paper

*my bottom retainer

*my sleep mask that I sometimes wear

*some face wash I got in the summer.

*some shirts that belong to a friend from freshman year

*a moth that was way too friendly. IHATEMOTHS.

*a math textbook that I thought I just hadn't gotten

*2 empty never-been-used 3-ring binders

*a prom dress (another thing I have never worn)

*a long-lost stash of tampons

*my 72-hr food kit from freshman year

*1 spiral notebook with like 4 dividers that has not a single word written in it

*a necklace

*a mirror Sarah made for me

*I think that's it.

Are you wondering where my plan book is on that list?

......Me too :( I'm also wondering where it is in real life.

Guys, I don't know how this happened. I have moved how many times since freshman year? Not only have I moved apartments in Provo - let's not forget that I have been home for the summer, or a large chunk of it, every year. I also lived in Florida for 4 months so I am really not sure how I overlooked these things and re-found them just now. It's not annoying that I'm re-finding long-lost items, just that everything I have hoarded since Freshman Year is suddenly resurfacing and my plan book, which I need tomorrow and which I had last semester, is nowhere to be found.

In happier news, I'm so excited about fourth grade! I love it already. I will post more on how great today was with my class later. If anyone has any advice, I'd love to hear it!

Awkward

Today, I went to the Creamery on 9th. This is what I needed to buy:

and .

Oh, also:
.

Whatever. I am a twenty-year-old woman. Making this kind of purchase does not bother me. I am far too mature to be fazed by such a responsibility. Except, I have never had such an awkward experience with it as I did today.

My first priority was getting paper plates, for a class party we are having on Wednesday. Then I picked up some conditioner. Then, as I walked confidently towards the section for feminine hygiene, it happened.

The creamery was suddenly swarmed by all the freshman boys currently living at Heritage. Seven of them, all about eight feet tall, nonchalantly set up camp right in front of my targeted purchase. They looked around, discussing how they should be at Subway instead. I couldn't have agreed more. I wanted them to be at Subway, too.

After idly looking over the hair products for a few minutes, I got tired of waiting. I marched up to them, determined not to be awkward. "Excuse me," I said.

"Oh, sorry," said one of them, and started to meander away. His friends turned to look at what I needed. Twelve eyes fell on the tampons, six necks turned red, and six awkward freshman boys scattered to all corners of the store. I might as well have been buying the antidote to the plague.

Still, in my earnest desire to avoid awkwardness, I took my time to make an educated decision about exactly which brand and box I wanted. I then walked up to the cash registers, where I was rejoined by the six giant freshmen, still talking about how great it would be if they were at Subway instead of the Creamery. I don't know what was keeping them there.

I put my conditioner, paper plates, and tampons on the little conveyor belt. The lady at the register snatched the tampons off the belt, scanned them, and threw them in a bag. Then she smiled sympathetically at me. "How is your day going?" she asked, her voice oozing with compassion.

I smiled. "Great!" I said. She smiled knowingly and started scanning my other items. "How's yours?" I asked.

"Pretty good," she said, and told me my total. I paid, thanked her, and left the Creamery.

Never to return again, because I just don't think I can handle it.