Beach Bums

Disney Land is a pretty magical place, but the next stop on our vacation was every bit as magical, in my opinion. It was a bit of a hassle in the assle to get to, but when we got there, it was so worth it!

"The pimp-friend-turned-tour guide, formerly known as Steve"

"Can you hold this please? In your face...." -Steve

S: Can you imagine life without GPS?
W: Can you imagine life without....cell phones, or cars, or World of Colors....

W: I really hope this is the beach house. Otherwise I'm just going to break in and pretend it is.
S: Oh hey, are you my dad's client? No? Well, now you are!

"I don't even want to drive after this. Like at all. I will let my body eat itself." -Steve

"Thanks for the love honk, dude." -Steve

"This GPS is stupid. I want to punch it." -Steve

H: You guys are such novices at being lost. See, I get lost all the time, so this is like, no big deal. Oooh, look at that pretty rose!
S: Maybe that's why you get lost all the time....
H: Huh?
S: Oooh! A flower! That's what you do when you get lost??

And then, we arrived. It was almost midnight, and we all just kind of stumbled into the beach house and dropped our stuff.

You guys. It was the cutest beach house I have ever been in. It was so adorable! There was a little kitchen, a little living room, two bedrooms, and two bathrooms. The best part? The beach was right outside the back door.

Despite Steve's earlier declaration that he never wanted to drive again, we did end up driving to the grocery store, where we got food like real people. Like groceries that real people eat. 

The next morning, I was woken up by Winnie saying: "Heather! Go look outside! It's a beautiful day!" I was so excited that I rolled out of bed and ran straight to the ocean to dip my toes in. If I could wake up every day to such a declaration, I would not even mind that. 

The rest of our time in Newport Beach is a blur of frozen bananas, sand castles, honkin huge starfish, beachside barbecues, healthy people, frisbee lessons, souvenir shopping, Jersey Shore, $300 palm trees, and absolutely no hanky panky.

H: I have a coupon for a free package of hot dogs if we want to use that?

T: For where?

W: Any grocery store. Anywhere that sells balls.....

"You're gorgeous, don't stop!" -Skater boy

"And tell Steve he's the luckiest man in California. He's driving around with the three most powerful women currently in California....he could run for governor right now if he wanted to. I never would have been able to get 3 girls to go to the beach with me. I want to know what kind of aftershave he's wearing!" -my dad

Beach Bum #1: Hey, where did I park my Mercedes?

Beach Bum #2: I think it was next to my BMW...

Beach Bum #3: Oh yeah, didn't we double-park?

"Hey Steve. If you really want, you can kiss me on the cheek, since the sun is setting on the beach." -Christine

S: Kimmy used to kick me there all the time.

K: Yeah, and every time I did, my dad would like pull aside and tell me why I couldn't do that. And I still. Did it.

S: I'd love to just....sit on the beach in a beach chair and have a talk with Jesus.

H: You're so California....

H: I feel like we aren't being as funny today.

Ch: That's because we actually got some sleep....

"I was in the bathroom, getting fresh to death, like I do....." -Mike (Jersey Shore)

T: And then she kinda just left me hangin'....

H: "Left me hangin'?" Is that really a phrase you want to be using in this story?