How it Started

I'll just address the elephant in the room right upfront: This is a long blog post. I put in some pictures, which I'm hoping will act as snacks in Sacrament Meeting and keep you entertained....mostly. Carry on!



Some might say that it all started with a note. But actually, it didn't. Actually, it all started with knock. And a handsome stranger asking if this was the apartment where our ward was having nice notes.

Some might say that it was the wrong apartment, and at the time, that's what I told him. But actually, it wasn't. Actually, it was the right apartment, and the right girl, and the right boy. I just didn't know it yet.

I didn't make a great first impression. As in, I asked him if he was weird and awkward in the first 3 minutes of knowing him, and he thought I was rude. [For the record, he was a teeny bit awkward, so it was a valid question.]

However, it wasn't such a bad impression that all hope was lost. He came over again, and I redeemed myself. And then, he came over again, and again, and then he kept coming over. And I didn't even mind.

October 9th was my birthday, and since the best friend advertised free food and birthday kisses in a painstakingly crafted mass txt, he was there.

Some might say that Stephen had nothing to do with building this cake. Those people would be right. He just put the candles on because I said we couldn't eat it until I had blown them out, and if we're being honest with ourselves, we might as well just admit that the cake was 90% of the reason why he was there.

I won't tell you what I wished for when I blew those candles out....but the weekend after my birthday, I found myself squashed up next to him on a couch in an apartment south of campus, watching a scary movie with some friends. And he held my hand.

He played it cool, but this is how he felt:

(Me, too.)

A week later, I got a mysterious nice note. It looked like this:

This is the note that some say it started with.

I searched the ward menu, and the only S.S. in our ward was Stephen Shimp. And I knew, grazie to my women's intuition, that Stephen had not written this nice note.

Even so, he did like my cute skirts. And we did go out sometime.

This is the night he wanted to take me on a date, but it was the ward Halloween party. So we just hung out there and took beautiful pictures like this one about it.

This is the night after the Halloween party, the other night he wanted to take me on a date. A Jew came to town and we had already planned on going to Cornbelly's with my roommates, so we just invited Stephen and his roommates along. They did things like taking pictures of us in the pumpkins and then offering to let us use them on our wedding announcements. I did things like pretending not to notice their comments....

This picture is not from a date either. It's just from Halloween day, when Stephen and I hung out for like the hundredth time. And for the first time, he caught a fish from the Raintree River. And also for the first time....something else happened :)

When we finally did go out sometime, it was to this place:

The Quarry

I had been rock climbing a few times, and even been on a few dates to this place. This date was the best of them all :)

This might be where my mom might say it all started. The day after he asked me on a date, I called my mom. 

"MOM," I said, "You'll never guess what happened to me."

"What!" she said, all excited already. 

"The cutest boy in the ward asked me on a date!" I said. "I think we're going this weekend!"

She cheered. She asked for his name. She facebook stalked him. She congratulated me.

That date was on November 3rd. And not to color myself psycho or anything, but in the interest of full disclosure I should probably share that when my sister asked me less than a month later if I liked him, I told her I kind of wanted to marry him. 

In December, we had all kinds of adventures.

December 1st found us ice-skating at the Gallivan Center....

 This conversation happened when we stepped out onto the ice:

Stephen: WHAT! Heather, you don't know how to ice-skate??
me: No, I do! I promise I do! I just....I forgot, but I'll remember in a second!
Stephen: Oh, no, no, Heather, noooo!
me: Stephen! It's fine, I'll remember! Just wait a minute!
Stephen: What are you doing? Heather, what??
me: I'm just skating! Hold on, just slow down for a second!

It was not my most graceful ice-skating debut, but as soon as I remembered what to do (after about 5 minutes of tremulously clinging to Stephen and insisting that I knew what I was doing), I actually did okay. 

Looking at the temple lights in SLC....

.....meeting some Anti-Mormons posing in awesome costumes for free pictures, forgive us for that brief affiliation.....

.....wandering the streets of SLC, looking for the car.....(Don't worry, it was parked at none of these hotels. We checked.) 

 

 

I love Christmastime. I love downtown Salt Lake City. And holding hands on the car ride back to Provo, once we finally found the car at 2 in the morning, I loved Stephen, too.

This one time, we made a bomb-amazing gingerbread house.

 Ingredients, if you're interested in replicating our fine work:

-Starbursts from my kids for Christmas
-Berry Colossal Crunch cereal for the roof
-fudge-striped cookies from a 100 calorie pack
-brownie bites, also from a 100 calorie pack
-Frosted Mini-Wheats cereal
-tootsie rolls from ???
-frosting from when my kids made gingerbread houses at school and the parent volunteers tried to throw away the frosting and well, I rescued it.
-graham crackers from a bonfire we attended in oh, October....

And then he went home to Indiana, and I went home to Maryland, and we skyped almost err day.

Even when I was back in Utah for New Years Eve and he was still in Indiana, and I should probably have been going to a party or something. We skyped then too.

When he managed to get his arse back in Utah, we had more adventures!

He taught me how to snowboard....

and one time, when we were snowboarding, he asked me to be his girlfriend!

I said no.

But then I said yes of course, so it was just a minor setback. Then we went home, made fajitas, called his parents, and - most importantly! - changed our facebook status (super-important, you guys. It is 2013)

I should note that, when we called his parents, his mom said I seemed really sweet :) ...........which she quickly followed up with an invitation to read the new For the Strength of Youth booklet. 

As boyfriend and girlfriend, we once optimistically went to Sundance to try to get into the Matthew Mc-con-a-hottie and Reese Witherespoon movie without previously buying tickets, and instead just eating at a cute Mexican restaurant when we found that there were no more tickets available.

We went to Fire and Ice at the Riverwoods. We missed the fireworks, and the snowboarding, and pretty much everything else, but we were in time for the ice sculptures!

....and in time to walk around and try on some really beautiful hats.

 Winter has never been my favorite season. As in, it has always been my worst-favorite season. But winter with Stephen is a nice season, because it involves fun things like snowboarding and yummy things like Little Caesar's pizza that I had to buy for my roommates and warm things like cuddling.

It was one night, later in the month of January, when Stephen said: "I don't want you to think I'm weird, but....do you ever think about, what it would be like if we were to like, get married?" 

I was so surprised that he said that, but to tell the truth, I did think about it. Pretty much err day.

All of a sudden, it was February, 

Jazz game!

 and then Valentines Day. 

Which was a perfect day with a perfect ending. The ending was a whisper that sounded like this:

him: Heather. 

me: Stephen. 

him: .....I love you. 

 

me: I love you, Stephen!

And with that, we started life with a new normal.

 

It was normal to go rock-climbing,

normal to go running,

normal to hike the Y (with one person riding piggy back at times),

normal to fall asleep on the apartment floor after working out.

It was normal to never have leftovers, because I had a Stephen instead. Normal to sit on his lap while he studied and I graded. Normal for him to come in and visit my class, when he had a chance. Normal for me to come and study with him in the library and go to classes with him when I was off-track, or to go to the UVU basketball games so he could get extra credit in his class. It was all just the best kind of normal I had ever lived!

So that's how I think it started. How THIS

happened, is a blog post for another day :)

Og-scuse Me??

If there’s one thing I’ve learned from doing EFY this summer, it is that getting to EFY to start off the week is always much more trouble than it should be.

You may remember the lovely adventure I had getting to Cincinnati. Here’s how this week started off:

Sunday

1:00 I go to my Singletree ward, which I love.

4:15 I leave said Singletree ward. I hurry home to pack, cram a donut down my throat, and look up directions to the Institute building in South Jordan (where I am contracted to work this week).

5:00 I leave my apartment with one suitcase, my scripture bag, my makeup bag, my shower bag, my school bag, and my purse. (I’m really good at making the right amount of pasta for any occasion / recipe / appetite. I’m not as good at packing the right amount of clothes / jewelry / hair flowers / shoes / knickknacks / crafting utensils for any trip that will take me away from my house for longer than 3 hours.)

6:00 I arrive at the Institute building in South Jordan. I meet a few people and sit through the meeting.

7:00 The coordinators in charge of the session call me out. They tell me they hate me and to leave immediately and never come back.

7:00 Okay actually that’s not what they said. They just said that they need one more counselor in Ogden and would I be willing to go? I said I could if they could get housing for me.

7:15 I leave Jordan and drive all the way to Ogden. I might have gotten lost once or twice five times. Just for a second.

8:15ish I arrive in Ogden. I get passed around from group to group until I finally find my BC group. They smile nicely at me. I get all the papers I need. I meet the girl I am going to be staying with this week. We smile nicely at each other. She asks me if I would be okay with just sleeping on a couch, and also told me that she is babysitting a turtle this summer, but she broke the tank, and it’s an aquatic turtle, so it is currently swimming around in her bathtub….so we’re going to have to use my downstairs neighbor’s bathroom for showering.

You can imagine how all of this made me feel.

But then, listen, guys. I followed her in my car to her house. And it is literally a 2 minute drive. And it is the cutest house. And the couch is huge, like the size of a twin bed. And she fed me chicken and real-people salad. And she has a puppy which is the cutest thing ever. And her downstairs neighbors are actually just downstairs roommates, so it’s not like I have to walk outside and go in someone else’s house to use the shower. And their shower is nicer than mine is at Raintree.

And I’m happy to be here. 

Awkward Turtle

Life can get a little awkward when……….

- You go to an elementary school (where you are supposed to be a teacher) and happen to be wearing the same skirt as one of the students.

-Someone asks how you and this boy know each other and the boy in question quickly replies “We flirt in church.”

-You go to buy a car and learn all about the dealer, including, but not limited to: his conversion to the church, the story of his move from Iran to America, how many kids are in his family, the life story of his favorite son, the story of the time he switched careers from making crowns and bridges for teeth to selling cars, his political leanings…..

-You can’t even bring yourself to smile at the people working at FedEx because that place is a joke and you feel a little bit like they are waxing your nostrils with duct tape because of how much everything costs.

-Sooomebody has to stand up and say how great of a game kissing rugby is, and no one else steps up to the plate, so it ends up being you. And then you’re that girl.

-You tell a few people that you are considering going back to your old ward this upcoming Sunday, and every last one of them responds: “Oh, there are no cute boys in your new ward?”

-And you have to admit that no, there are not.


-You have a dream that you are serving a mission and your mission president's wife is giving a presentation to welcome you to the mission, and she announces that Matt Damon is in the boundaries of the mission, and he loves the missionaries, so feel free to get rides with him whenever, but don't kiss him. She goes on, "It is soooo hard not to kiss him. But don't do it. My gosh. It's, like really hard." And then all the other sister missionaries turn to you and nod and confirm that it is so hard not to kiss him. 

-Also, Arie was supposed to be going to your mission, too, but he broke his leg right before. So that's a bummer. 

-You have to tell a dealer that you don’t want their car, and you find yourself channeling your inner Emily Maynard in the hopes that you will be able to break up with the dealer as gracefully as she broke up with 24 guys.

-You call your mom every day at the same time to ask her to get you un-lost again.

-You seriously consider going to the dollar theater to watch “The Lucky One” by yourself, since your Zac Efron fan friend is currently in a different state and your other friends expressed specific disdain for the fact that he won some Teen Choice Awards.

But for real, how could you find fault with this?

-You watch Toddlers and Tiaras and it has the opposite of the intended effect on you. As in, you watch it and kind of want to put your children in pageants….

-Someone txts you "Be there in a sex."

-The next day, someone else txts you "Ok, see you in a sex."

-Both someones are immediately horrified and correct themselves. Both someones get a txt from you that says, "I'm sexcited!" because you are convinced that it wasn't only funny the first time and that this is a joke that is okay to repeat with different audiences.

-You fill out a damage sheet for the apartment you just moved into, which is the same apartment you painted 2 years ago, and in the spot where it asks about whether the walls are white or painted, you not only list the colors of all the walls but also compliment them.

-You go to buy 50 composition notebooks, 25 pencil boxes, 25 highlighters, 50 colored pens, 30 dry erase markers, 25 desk name tags, 50 boxes of crayons, 60 erasers, 48 glue sticks, and 100 folders at Walmart, and the cashier asks: "Are you a teacher?"

-And you respond, "No, I just have a lot of kids." 

-And for a second, he looks like he believes you.

-You txt a friend and accidentally ask what time "Capture the Fag" is going to start.

-You meet the worst boy ever at the pool, and he is the really persistent kind who keeps trying to talk to you and your friends, despite your blatantly rude body language that clearly says "don't talk to me, in fact would you please go crawl into a hole because that's how annoying you are...."

-You go to a baseball game and are told by the little girl sitting in front of you “Okay, I won’t lick your legs. But they sure do look tasty!”

-You go to the bank to deposit a check like an adult and the banker goes to shake your hand and asks what your name is, and you have to shift everything you're holding to the other hand and pull the lollipop out of your mouth to answer, and you realize that no amount of check-depositing will truly make you into an adult. 

-You and your sister make cupcakes for a friend for her birthday. They are the best cupcakes ever. Then, you don't know where she lives, so you just eat a couple while you wait on getting her address.

-On a possibly related note, you learn, through personal experience, that it is indeed possible to eat 18 cupcakes in 5 days. By yourself. 

And finally, it can get a little awkward when all the things on this list are actually the little things that make your life really enjoyable :)

Beach Bums

Disney Land is a pretty magical place, but the next stop on our vacation was every bit as magical, in my opinion. It was a bit of a hassle in the assle to get to, but when we got there, it was so worth it!

"The pimp-friend-turned-tour guide, formerly known as Steve"

"Can you hold this please? In your face...." -Steve

S: Can you imagine life without GPS?
W: Can you imagine life without....cell phones, or cars, or World of Colors....

W: I really hope this is the beach house. Otherwise I'm just going to break in and pretend it is.
S: Oh hey, are you my dad's client? No? Well, now you are!

"I don't even want to drive after this. Like at all. I will let my body eat itself." -Steve

"Thanks for the love honk, dude." -Steve

"This GPS is stupid. I want to punch it." -Steve

H: You guys are such novices at being lost. See, I get lost all the time, so this is like, no big deal. Oooh, look at that pretty rose!
S: Maybe that's why you get lost all the time....
H: Huh?
S: Oooh! A flower! That's what you do when you get lost??

And then, we arrived. It was almost midnight, and we all just kind of stumbled into the beach house and dropped our stuff.

You guys. It was the cutest beach house I have ever been in. It was so adorable! There was a little kitchen, a little living room, two bedrooms, and two bathrooms. The best part? The beach was right outside the back door.

Despite Steve's earlier declaration that he never wanted to drive again, we did end up driving to the grocery store, where we got food like real people. Like groceries that real people eat. 

The next morning, I was woken up by Winnie saying: "Heather! Go look outside! It's a beautiful day!" I was so excited that I rolled out of bed and ran straight to the ocean to dip my toes in. If I could wake up every day to such a declaration, I would not even mind that. 

The rest of our time in Newport Beach is a blur of frozen bananas, sand castles, honkin huge starfish, beachside barbecues, healthy people, frisbee lessons, souvenir shopping, Jersey Shore, $300 palm trees, and absolutely no hanky panky.

H: I have a coupon for a free package of hot dogs if we want to use that?

T: For where?

W: Any grocery store. Anywhere that sells balls.....

"You're gorgeous, don't stop!" -Skater boy

"And tell Steve he's the luckiest man in California. He's driving around with the three most powerful women currently in California....he could run for governor right now if he wanted to. I never would have been able to get 3 girls to go to the beach with me. I want to know what kind of aftershave he's wearing!" -my dad

Beach Bum #1: Hey, where did I park my Mercedes?

Beach Bum #2: I think it was next to my BMW...

Beach Bum #3: Oh yeah, didn't we double-park?

"Hey Steve. If you really want, you can kiss me on the cheek, since the sun is setting on the beach." -Christine

S: Kimmy used to kick me there all the time.

K: Yeah, and every time I did, my dad would like pull aside and tell me why I couldn't do that. And I still. Did it.

S: I'd love to just....sit on the beach in a beach chair and have a talk with Jesus.

H: You're so California....

H: I feel like we aren't being as funny today.

Ch: That's because we actually got some sleep....

"I was in the bathroom, getting fresh to death, like I do....." -Mike (Jersey Shore)

T: And then she kinda just left me hangin'....

H: "Left me hangin'?" Is that really a phrase you want to be using in this story?

In the House of the Mouse

There is a place in this world where dreams come true. 

I know the Utah state song says that Utah is the place where dreams come true (3:01), but I am not referring to Utah. I am referring to......

DISNEY LAND!

Specifically, the pineapple dole whip stand outside of the Tiki Room at Disney Land. That is the place where my dreams come true. 

This little girl's dreams also come true at Disney Land: 

  

The day started off with us not being able to find Disney Land. Does that make us sound dumb? If you just said yes, I would like you to change your attitude and blame the GPS. That's what we did :) 

"Oh, sorry. We were just trying to find Disney Land." -Christine

"I feel like Disney Land is just....invisible. Well, maybe not. Maybe it's visible, to everyone but us." -Steve

Ch: I was about to suggest that Heather get out and push the button, but then I was worried she would get kidnapped. 

S: I wasn't even worried about that, I was thinking she would get shot!

Ch: Oh, wow, that's way worse!

W: I mean, they both sound pretty bad, I'm not sure which is worse....

"Disney looks a lot more boring than it did in the pictures...." *When our GPS told us that we had arrived and we were next to some law building*

S: I'm just gonna pull over and ask that guy how to get to Disney Land.

W: Does he speak English?

S: *catching a glimpse* Oh, nope!

H: Wait. Didn't you serve a Spanish-speaking mission? 

S: I'm not that good....

H: How hard is it to say, donde esta Disney Land?

H: You're like, the real mom. And I'm like the rich stepmom who awkwardly decided to come on the family vacation and I'm trying to buy everyone's love. 

W: It's working for me!

Eventually, we noticed some roller coasters on the horizon and drove towards them. We parked. We got our own personal bus ride to the park. We collected our free tickets. We collected our badges. Christine got a Birthday one, Winnie and Steve got "I'm celebrating!" pins, and I got "Happily Ever After." ......?? 

"I ain't got a lick of sense, I'll tell you that right now." 

Her: This the party bus! 

Us: You like your job?

Her: F no. 

Her: I'm jealous y'all are goin into the park. Well, have fun without me. Have a fun day. I'll just be out here, driving your people around. 

Ch: Come with us!

Her: Oh! Okay. Okay, yeah! I'll just drive my bus in, how about that?

Us: *Encouraging*

Her: *grabbing the bus walky-talky thing and pretending to talk into it* What are you doing in the park? - Uh, I'm sorry, I'm sorry sir. - Again? Really? - Yes sir, I'm sorry. This is the last time, I promise. These nice people just invited me to go with them. - But we've told you before - Yes sir, I know. .... - we've told you before, that driving your bus in the parks is frowned on. 

-our bus driver

Christine used this cool program called Ride Max to figure out when we should get in line for specific rides, when we should get our Fast Passes, etc. It was awesome! We never waited more than 15 minutes for a ride.

For whatever reason, Steve decided that he was Iron Man. He also had a bad few minutes where he decided that Iron Man needed to speak in third person.....just as a side note.

S: *zipping up his jacket to cover his "I'm Celebrating!" pin* I'll just be like, hey Christine. Pull down my zipper. I have a surprise for you. 
H: ......are you really gonna say that?


"These lockers are pretty big, who would ever need a jumbo one? Are they trying to park their car here? Leave a child?" 


H: Winnie! It's Winnie the Pooh! You need a picture!
W: *observing the long line* How about a stalker picture?

Ch: There are a couple of lookout points on Tom Sawyer Island....

S: You would know about those!

Do you see my face in this picture? That is exactly how I felt to be on that ride. 

H: I don't really like mandarin oranges. 

W: Why not? They're kind of like lil cuties, and you love those.

H: I know, but.....

-30 seconds later-

H: Okay these are the best things ever! I was just thinking how they are different than lil cuties, and they're only different in ways that make them better! You don't have to peel them, and they don't go bad as fast....how have I never realized that these are the most amazing things ever!?

If you've never been to Disney Land, there is a fun little thing called "Turtle Talk with Crush." Crush, from Finding Nemo, interacts with the people in the audience and asks them questions and answers their questions, and it's really cool and I don't know how they do it. Anyway, the picture above is of us getting ready for Turtle Talk :)

Crush to Little Girl: What do humans like to do for fun?
Little Girl: Well.....I......um.....my......my mommy paid over $1000 just to bring me here. 

Not to be rude, but the family sitting behind us on Tower of Terror was so funny. None of them spoke English except the oldest daughter, who was probably 12 or 13, and I'm pretty sure none of them had any idea that they were getting on a ride that was going to dead-drop them several stories. Their reactions were priceless. 

All of us loved the ride, but apparently we were in the minority. When we went to the bathroom after the ride, we overheard another little girl, who was probably 11 or 12, crying to her mom about her experience.

Girl: That was awful. I'm never going on that ride again. I've never been so scared for my life!

Mom: Well, I won't go on it again either, honey. 

Girl: It was like, they opened the windows, and I knew where that ride got its name. I'm still shaking! I'm still crying!

W: Did you hear that?

Ch: Uh, the longest pee EVER?

H: No.....the girl crying

"I almost want to buy that picture, just so I can have a picture of you sitting by yourself on the roller coaster." -Steve is a wonderful brother

If you haven't been to Disney Land sometime in the last few years, you haven't seen World of Colors. All I can say about that is, I am so sorry for you. This show was amazing and I think my mouth was open for at least half of it. They used lasers and water and projectors and lights and fire and music and it was just so awesome. 

And after it was over, we may or may not have stormed off to our car yelling about how great Disney is. 

"DISNEY. That's the only thing that matters in this life!"

"I have to quit school. I don't need to be a lawyer! I just need to spend all my money on coming here again and again to watch World of Colors."

Ch: Can we just listen to Disney music the whole way to the beach?

H: YES!~

W: Can we just listen to Disney music for the rest of our lives?

"Now I understand why churros cost $5. They have to pay for that awesome show! I understand now. And I fully support those $5 churros."

W: I think that show alone made this day worthwhile.

H: It was so worth that free ticket!

I just wanted to end on this picture because, well, look at it. Look at how hilarious it is. Look at how awkward our poses are. None of us knows what happened with this picture.....the guy taking our picture just told us to strike a pose and we were on the spot and we were tired and Christine tried to do Mickey ears and....yeah.